A campaign staffer document of extremely dubious credibility allegedly belonging to the Clinton Campaign was dug out of the trash can of a Sophomore dorm room in Colorado.

The document outlines the mastermind planning to destroy the credibility of Barack Obama.  Oddly the actual tactics deployed recently appear at the bottom of the list.  Many media pundits believe in the tooth fairy, but they also believe that the Clinton camp is releasing these hits one at a time in reverse order:

QUESTIONS FOR CIRCULATION TO DESTROY BARACK OBAMA

1. Barack, Did you Stop beating your wife before or after she stopped beating you?
2. When did you stop taking human growth hormones for your Ears?
3. Did you sell Crack to pay for the dope you smoked, or sell dope to pay for the crack you smoked?
4. Did you smoke all your crack before you turned 18 or did you sell it after you turned 18?
5. Did you promise Oprah a Crack Smoking Confessional in Exchange for her support?
6. If you were elected President would you grant a pardon for any of your friends in prison for distributing drugs in exchange for their silence and copies of the negatives?
7. On a scale of Britney Spears to Robert Downey Jr. are you a Ditzy dope fiend or a hopeless crack head?
8. Regarding Foreign Affairs, can you confirm or deny that the crack and marijuana you smoked was or was not laced with Heroin produced by the Taliban in Afghanistan?
9. Do you feel that you will be able to act more openly to solve America’s drug problems since you have had such an extensive drug using background?  And if yes, would you recommend that other teenagers should smoke marijuana and take cocaine if they too want to be able to fight the good fight on the War on Drugs?
10. As President, would you nominate a proxy to serve as Commander in Chief if you are unable to get a Top Secret security clearance due to your drug problems?
11. Did your parents coach you to write a kindergarten paper expressing your desire to be President of the United States?
12. Which helped more to end bed wetting episodes when you were 17?  Smoking Marijuana, snorting cocaine or smoking crack?
13. Did you ever sell your body or provide sexual favors in exchange for drugs or money used for drugs?
14. Did you prefer to masturbate to Hustler, Playboy, Jugs or Oui when you were on drugs?  How about now?
15. When you were masturbating to Hustler did you listen to Ronald Reagan State of the Union Addresses mixed to country & western music?

Click the map below to review the Chain of Evidence of this document

Text Accounting of Chain of Evidence of this controversial document.  Some even question its existence or authenticity:

1 Proposed Circulation Path of Clinton Document

1.1 A Tree was cut in an India forest

1.2 Tree was converted to paper on a Chinese ship headed for Los Angeles

1.3 A Los Angeles dock worker from Compton unloaded the container vessel with the paper on it.

1.3.1 later died from a gun shot wound by a LA’s finest during a traffic stop after he reached for his wallet sitting in plain site on the dash of the car in broad day light. He was driving a convertible.

1.4 Paper shipped to an Office Max in New Hampshire

1.5 Paper sold to Clinton Campaign Volunteer

1.6 Paper was slightly ripped as it was fed through Xerox

1.7 Clinton senior staff passed the paper around like a mad lib during a

drunken debacle involving a Rum laden espresso machines on July 3rd 2007, each adding outrageous claims and questions.

1.7.1 Hillary was reportedly Cackling very loud the entire time, but may not have touched the paper with her own hands.

1.8 The paper was Xeroxed and hung on the wall of campaign offices around the country. Secret light filter glasses were needed to read the paper through a protective filter that made it look like a casual Clinton Campaign Sign.

1.9 October, all copies were collected and destroyed, the original was not located

1.10 The volunteer took it home where cousin later found the paper during Thanksgiving.

1.10.1 He later went on a rampage hoping to black mail Clinton, when that failed he took hostages using common road flairs.

1.11 The deranged man, had attempted to mail the document to his lawyer, but accidentally mailed it to a college student in Colorado.

1.12 The Colorado college student opened the letter and thought it was a crank. He threw it in the trash.

1.13 A dorm monitor inspected the room, looking for drugs, found the document and turned it over to the Log Cabin Republicans, who are rumored to be holding the document hoping to negotiate a new plank in the Republican Party.

Similar Fantastic Articles:

1. Barack Obama Files Restraining Order Against Hillary Clinton Barack Obama filed a restraining order against Hillary Clinton citing threats against his life and...
2. Clinton v Obama Bowling Grudge Match for Delegates We all knew that this race would eventually come to blows and Hillary Clinton went...
3. The Ultimate Power Broker’s Menage a Troi: President Barack, First Lady Obama and VP Oprah Barack Obama is living the American man’s dream.  He is running for President of the...
4. Hillary Clinton Raise $2 million from Conservative Republicans in 2007 Republicans love to hate Hillary Clinton just about as much as they think they  love...
5. He’s Barack Obama Its a bird! Its a plane! No, he’s Barack Obama and hes come to save...

3 Responses to “Document Shows 15 Other Questions the Clinton Camp Would Have Used to Attack Barack Obama”