Mitt Romney lost the West Virginia Caucus today and he’s hopping mad about the unfairness of the Caucus process.  The caucus works when people filter into a room and choose a table to sit at.  The table with the most people wins the nomination for that state.  If no one has a majority, then the tables with numbers under 15% have to go sit at one of the other tables.

In West Virginia on the first round, Mitt Romney’s table came in first, Mike Huckabee came in second and John McCain came in a distant distant third.  But no one had a majority.

It was around lunch time when things wrapped on that first session and people were hungry.  Unfortunately, Romney’s table didn’t allow donuts or coffee since Romney is Mormon and the hungry McCain supporters had to choose between water and crackers or Starbucks and Krispy Kremes.  They weren’t sure what to do so they called John McCain, who told his supporters that he did not want to torture them and that they should vote their stomach and that’s how the McCain supporters decided to switch to the Huckabee table and let Huckabee jump from second to first!

Mitt Romney then turned to his buddies at the ACLU and at the Federal Election Committed to look into the fairness of an event that could be decided on transfats and caffeine ingredients that are taboo at best for Mormons.