Ten Thoughts to Ponder for 2009

Number 10

Life is sexually transmitted. 

Number 9

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8

Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. 
If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day,  teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6

Some people are like a Slinky …
Not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals, dying of nothing.

Number 4

All of us could take a lesson from the weather.   It pays no attention to Criticism.

Number 3

Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00, and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

Number 2

In the 60′s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is Weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. 

And The Number 1 Thought For 2009

"Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers; What you do today, might Burn Your Ass Tomorrow"

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